Now, I want to start off by saying, I know I don't have all the answers and that I am far from a perfect parent. But there are times when I see parents making huge mistakes with their children and I want to scream, "Do you know what you are doing to your child??!!!" I honestly hope that no one has ever thought that about me, but chances are we've all made a mistake or two. And with 15-20 more years left in parenting, I am sure to make a few if I haven't already.
Before being a stay at home mom, I was a Junior High teacher. I had plenty of lessons in how not to be a good parent. Kids who were screaming for attention in negative ways, watching things well above their maturity level, allowed to get away with anything because their parents thought they were perfect and infallible, girls searching for acceptance through boyfriends and false love, boys searching for respect through conquests. All of these things, I believe, could have been prevented by parents thinking about how their actions, words and choices might affect their children for years and decades to come. So I thought I would start writing about some of my Parenting Pet Peeves over the next few weeks.
Parenting Pet Peeve #1 - Verbal put-downs
Think about what you say and how it might effect the self esteem of your child.
"You screwed it up again"
"why can't you do it like your brother?"
"Get it right this time"
"Your never going to get it right"
How can anyone say these things to their children and expect them to become better? I always think that in this day with all the information we have about being good parents, it is common sense. But then I see well educated, well rounded people saying things that they probably heard from their parents and for some reason can not recognize that they are doing the same thing to their own children.